Aug 1, 2014

The long lost spirit.

I was overwhelmed,by the old me.I mean,I don't know which part of me have changed,but at least I've changed.I made a lot of improvements,without myself realizing.

When I turned back to my past,I just get to know that I am such a fighter.A fighter that fought within herself,her emotions,her ups and downs,her personal problems."She" used to be a very enthusiastic fighter,and will always do.

She,the new me,was someone that never say no to whatever resisted within her ability borders,she was the person who would die for something that seems to be not realistic into a tangible one.

She was the girl,dying over thousands of enemies,but managed to wake up and took out the sword,kill the enemies.No doubt,no guilt.

No,she wasn't the gifted one,but she tried so hard to be among the gifted.No,she wasn't a genius,but she climbed so high to stand among geniuses and received awards,and awards,and awards.What makes a difference between "she" and others? The level of hardworking,consistency,and belief.

Because she believed that if they could do that,why shouldn't 'I'?
Because she believed that whatever path with thorns or storms,will led her to success.

She ain't no one.She's the mere one.

Is always the word I'm afraid of,though you can see aeroplanes flying over the KMB's sky every 5 minutes.

Even now I am here,training myself the best foundation into being a good product of Islam(though I am still far from it)..still.Afraid to say that the sky is within my limit,to say that yes I'll fly,to say that yes I'll reach UK.

Why? where's the she? No she's still in the 'I'.But,it takes time to polish that she,so that it would be the new me.

I am,doubtful of this blurred path.I do,I enjoy every single little thing happening here.I love everything here,and what is between KMB and KL.

But,seeing of the requirements needed to be fulfilled by sponsor,and the new rules to be endorsed soon..I am still doubtful of whether I could make it,and be among the KMBians untill the final IB exam.

I always told myself,that this is it the path I've choosen.No turning back,and seize the day.
But to walk the talk is another problem,fighting for confidence to fly is so another thing inside me.

It ain't about reaching for the sky,even everyone is dreaming of it.But it is more than that,and still needs a tough heart and strong will to pass the IB program.

To fight is within yourself.You are the enemy of yourself.

Gosh,I need to find the "she".