Dec 7, 2012

What I learnt.

Assalamualaikum warahmatullahi wabarakaatuh.

Living life at the fullest rejoice for every second in my life for the past weeks ago , I just cant believe.
Because one day, I just realised that I made too much mistakes but no one to correct me. That I also realise that too much people talking about me, good or bad just hurt me enough.

I was crying less than a week before my biggest exam this year, SMA.
I cried too much during that week.I just could not bare the feeling alone.People know how I'm trying to teach myself to be 'cool', seeing cry as a weekness.But in the end, I was the one stucked into emotional problems and yadaa yadaa, cried.

Receiving, nominated as lalalalaaa*taknak cakap* is huge enough as unpayable sustenance to Allah.But, through what I got, and being nominated as..., I should prepared that somehow people would talk bad about me, because of what I got.

PEOPLE.They would never be happy, full of envyness, different perceptions in life , causes me to have a big problem in the end.But hey, I should say thanks to them for the things they did, because I wont get any loss, indeed - a benefit.PAHALA.

Thankss ! I could still remember a friend of mine came to me, saying that I'm such a noob person, love to show whatever she have, aahhh whateverr.She never knows the reason behind.

I mean, yeah let me be frank.*susah noo nak cer bila berahsia ni hak hak*
I was nominated as 'Pelajar PMR terbaik Negeri Selangor' and thus I am too happy. I received a letter from JPS.So I took the picture of the letter - which contained my seniora name * Sulaiman, K.Una ( for their STPM achievement, and me ) so I uploaded to our batch's FB.

My intention is just to share what I got with my batch friends.Nothing more.

''tapi bal , kau ni suka la menunjuk-nunjuk.''

I smiled.Bitter smile.How could she say that to me, she's just nothing more than knowing me less than a year, and she dont even close to me ! But I accept what she said.Trying to be positive.

I remember a night where I study Tafsir Hadith and my ustaz said;
''There are two different conditions here. 

1- You might saw a man washing his face.Then you ask him, what are you doing? He answered,
'I am washing my face to make me fresher.'

2- You might saw a man, doing the same thing, then you asked him, 'are you washing your face?'.Then he answered ' Nay,I am doing my wudhu' for prayer.'

See? Well said enough, dont judge something with your naked eye. What is seems to see, doesnt mean what you see and think.It could be different, and it can be.There are big possibilities there.

Huu, so people stop judging me.If you see me flawless, trust me I am flawfull.What I afraid of people to see me 'perfect', they could not accept my mistakes,someday.So..umm..just a lil bit of advice, dont judge me. I am differ than what you think.I am undescribable.I could be quiet, but I can be talkative.I could be over confident, but I could also blush.Help me, to improve myself towards a good muslimah.Aaamiin ya Allah :')

Assalamualaikum, and astalavista !